WHAT AM I GOOD AT?
This was the first thing that popped in my head when I was figuring out what to do with my life.
As I mentioned in my previous blog, us, the depressed, refuse to SIMPLY live. We want to live with a purpose. We NEED to have a purpose, coz we need an answer to, “why do I still need to live?”.
What do I have to offer?
What do I have that the world could possibly need?
How can I help?
What do I want to be known for?
I have been asking myself these for almost two years. Yes, I am already doing something good through my business that assists local manufacturers and micro entrepreneurs in marketing and selling their products. But I feel that this isn’t the purpose that I have been searching for. I can do more than this.
But WHAT is it? HOW can I do it?
What else can I do?
What am I good at?
I ask myself over and over again, but it seemed impossible to find the answer.
Maybe I was asking the right questions, just not asking them to the right person.
“Nobody knows us better than ourselves.” This may be true to a lot of people, but it doesn’t apply for people like us.
Since we have the cursed twins in our system (depression and anxiety), our minds are too clouded for us to realize our own strengths. We are too afraid to say that we are good at something and just end up embarrassing ourselves. We are too scared to claim that we can do something and end up disappointing the people who believe in us.
All these self-doubts, and fears of rejection and embarrassment hinder our self discovery. How can we begin if we cannot identify the things that we’re actually good at?
Again, we have to accept that our minds don’t work the same as theirs. We may think we know ourselves better than anyone else, but what we actually know is that we are weak; that we are tired; that we are worthless; that the world is better off without us; that we are not good at anything.
Other people don’t see us that way. They find it absurd whenever we say we are tired or that we are weak. Them not believing us when we are saying these things could actually be a good thing.
Coz when we say we are useless, they will say otherwise;
When we say we are weak, they will say otherwise;
When we say that the world is better off without us, they will say otherwise;
And when you ask them: “what am I good at?”, they will be able to say that you are good at this “thing” that you have been doing for a while. You just didn’t realize that you are actually doing it better than most people.
Then you’ll be blurting out in surprise, “Oh yeah, right! I am good at that!”.
So don’t ask yourself. Ask someone else — a friend, an enemy, a mentor, a sister, a parent.
Coz the truth is, that “thing” that the other person said you were good at actually crossed your mind. You just didn’t KNOW you were good at it until you heard it from someone else.